Promises, Promises
by LizzieV
Summary: Olivia Benson/Vicki Alicia Sayers played by the lovely Jennifer Love Hewitt . Spoilers for "Behave"...this is what happened after.
1. Promises, Promises

**A/N: I'm an A/O kinda girl, but JLove is too good to pass up! I mean when Dick Wolf didn't, one, make her kill herself, or two, make her shoot the prick who stalk/raped her guaranteeing her own cell at Riker's…Vicki Alicia Sayers became one of my favorite SVU characters. Don't own them and am not making any money.**

* * *

**"Promises, Promises"**

"Hey El, I'm going to take off a little early today. " Olivia didn't even bother to sit down at her desk chair as she signed the final bits of paperwork and handed them to her partner, knowing he would get them to the right people and files.

"Yeah, yeah." He gave her a knowing glance. "Say 'hi' to her for me."

Olivia shook her head and squinted her eyes, "what are you trying to say, Stabler?"

"Liv, I'm a detective if you haven't noticed. Don't insult my intelligence." He knocked her on the shoulder with the folder he was carrying around to look busy. "Oh, and Vicki told me she invited you to dinner when we were leaving the tombs. I had Frisco in the lobby keep her company while you finished up." He grinned and stepped away to avoid any potential backlash.

All Benson could do was smirk and throw a "thank you" to her partner as she made her way down the stairs. She forwent the finger she really wanted to throw at him along with her gratitude.

* * *

"I guess we've come a long way from you arresting me." They were seated in a corner table at Enzo's, across the street from the precinct. The server had come, gone, and come again with their drink order.

"Sorry, I guess it's habit when someone is," Olivia paused for dramatic effect. "I don't know, pointing a gun at me?" She deadpanned.

"I don't know what I was thinking." Vicki so easily fell into the regret she'd lived with for fifteen years.

"You weren't." Liv reached across the table and laid it gently on top of Vicki's. "It's okay."

"Olivia, I just need to say," the younger woman turned her hand in Olivia's grasp until their palms were flush, "thank you."

"You don't need to thank me. I promised that we would get the douche bag, and once he's done serving the sentence for what he did to you—that is, if he's still alive—let's just say I put in a good word with the feds." Olivia squeezed her hand.

"And you didn't even have to live with me for the next twenty years to do that." Vicki grinned and looked up at her dining companion.

"Hey, is that a smile?" Olivia mimicked the expression. "I think that's the first time I've seen you do that."

"I hope to do it a lot more often now." Vicki looked away bashfully and let go of Olivia's hand to reach for the menu.

"So, what are you planning to do now?" Olivia opened a Splenda packet and stirred it into her iced tea.

"I'm not making any big decisions right now, but I'm thinking of leaving the medical field." Vicki opened her menu. "I've always thought it'd be cool to be a lawyer."

"Wow, that's a big change." Olivia sipped her drink. "A lot more schooling, but I think you'd be great at it."

"Well, I've had a lot of time to study for the LSATs and have taken some transferable online courses." The young woman set the menu aside, "all I need to do is send out my law school applications."

"Why law?"

"Because the next time there's another Bill Harris that does this to a woman, I want to make sure I am there so they don't have to go through the same obstacles I did." The intensity in her tone was surprising. "And you of all people know there will be another."

Olivia didn't know what to say except to try to apologize. Apologize for the law and the statute of limitations. Apologize for the inhumane backlog of rape kits across the country. Apologize she hadn't taken the bastard into a dark alley and made sure he was never heard from again. Vicki realized how her statement had come across.

"You're blameless in all this, Olivia. I have nothing but gratitude for your…industriousness." Vicki laughed. "I'm trying to use bigger, lawyer-like words."

"I just wish I could have done more." There was always more to be done in Olivia's mind.

"You're doing it right now." Vicki sighed and waited for Olivia to meet her eyes. "You're helping me live again."

"How long has it been since you've eaten out?"

"Three years. Even when I lived with my mom, she was pretty sick and didn't get out much." Her voice never wavered, but was still full of emotion. "That was just fine with me."

"Well, I'm glad you're here now."

"I'm glad too."

The server returned and took their order, bringing their meals quickly (Olivia had an "in" with practically everyone in the neighborhood). The two women spent their dinner in companionable conversation, finding many items in common and plenty of shared laughs. After a brief spat over the bill (Vicki was surprisingly quick with the credit card), they walked back onto the street.

"Hey, why don't you come back to my hermitage and watch a movie with me? It's been a long time since I've had anyone over." Vicki's joking request was made with a shy confidence.

"I have a better idea. Let's catch a movie in a theater." Olivia looked over at the beautiful young woman next to her, carefully linking their arms as they walked. "There's something _I_ haven't done in about three years."

"As long as you promise to buy the popcorn." Vicki Sayers adjusted her arm until it was pressed comfortably against Detective Benson's side.

"That's definitely a promise I can keep."

* * *

**A/N2: What do you think, any potential? Should I even consider turning this into a series? I mean, I can write all day with JLove as a muse…lemme know.**


	2. Promise Number One

A/N: Thanks for the reviews of the first chapter…they were a little mixed as to what to do with these two, but I'm going to go with my gut. There _will_ be a relationship with these two, but it will be very slow to develop. You've been warned. Both ways. This was supposed to be two shorter chapters, but I got carried away and just finished it up. Enjoy!

A/N2: This one's for you, DarkVigilante! Thanks for the much-needed prodding.

* * *

**Chapter 2**

"Promise me you'll get help." The detective handed a business card to the younger woman, making sure she put it into her pocket.

"Olivia, I don't know." Vicki sighed. "I think once the trial is over and he's put away, I'll have enough closure to get on with my life. I don't think I need help?" She confided unsure as she tilted her head to the side and crossed her arms across her chest.

"Dr. Corrigan is not only a great rape crisis counselor, but she's also a close friend. Trust me, it's good to have someone to talk to."

"I can just talk to you?" Vicki's quiet question put tiny fissures in Olivia's heart. They'd reached the reinforced fortress that was the younger woman's apartment and Olivia stopped Vicki's progress with a hand to her forearm. She would not be going in tonight.

"Of course you can talk to me, but you also need to talk to a professional. Someone who you know is completely removed from the investigation and trial…and all the other crap that comes along with this thing." What was it about this woman that made it hard for Olivia to form coherent arguments? "Please, just call her? Do it for me?" _Where did that come from?,_ she barely knew her.

Vicki stood on her stoop and looked at Olivia, feeling safe with the detective's grasp on her arm never wavering. Fifteen years of hell she was trying to keep from bubbling over the surface and this woman in front of her was quickly breaking down her defenses. It didn't seem healthy. "Okay, if you think it's for the best, I'll see her."

"Good, she's expecting your call." Olivia gave her classic mirthless smile as she turned to leave. "Let me know if you need anything."

"Olivia?"

"Yeah?" Olivia turned back around.

"Thanks again." The younger woman hugged the detective, her eyes welling with unshed tears as she punched the security code quickly and fumbled the keys to open her apartment door. The next try was more successful and Vicki Sayers was safely in as Olivia Benson stood still dumbfounded.

* * *

Dr. Helen Corrigan was at the point in her career where she could be a part-time psychiatrist and a part-time humanitarian. And a part-time mother of three. She rarely took on new cases, using the few hours dedicated to her mental health practice to see the people she's been helping for years. What time was left from that (and guiding an unruly high school Senior through his final year of public education—the two older daughters already successfully secured at college—was pretty time-consuming) was spent organizing volunteers around the country in building houses for those in need. "Habitat for Humanity" if you will, on a smaller scale and with an emphasis on the Gulf region affected by Hurricane Katrina. It amazed Helen that five years later there still existed such dire need.

But, Dr. Corrigan sat in her office for a first session with Vicki Sayers as a distinct favor to Olivia Benson. She had the pleasure of knowing Detective Benson for almost a decade and had the utmost respect for the tough-as-nails woman who stopped at nothing to make sure the victims came first. So it was a no-brainer that she would make time for the young woman Olivia seemed so invested in.

As Helen sat transfixed—notepad in hand—listening to Vicki tell her story, she tried to remember any patient with such a grotesquely compelling story. And to compound the stalking and rape over the past decade and a half was the fact that Ms. Sayers had yet to properly process her mother's death. It sounded like she might even harbor some resentment towards her parents for not protecting her better when this whole affair started.

But what really stuck out was how many times Vicki was mentioning Olivia Benson. It was natural for the victim to emotionally attach themselves to the person who stopped the cycle of abuse, but this seemed to go even beyond that. When Ms. Sayers described the less-than-standard approach the detectives took to get her attacker to "slip up," Vicki spoke of Olivia as if she were a guardian angel.

She made a note to tackle that subject in a different session and made sure as the young woman gathered her things to remind her to make an appointment for the upcoming week with the receptionist.

Tough to imagine, but this would definitely be a new experience for even Dr. Helen Corrigan.

* * *

It was a unique night when Olivia Benson found herself at home before midnight. She was mindlessly watching some dance competition on TV when her cell phone started ringing. The display said "Helen Corrigan." She immediately answered.

"How's she doing?" It'd been about three weeks since Olivia gave Dr. Corrigan's card to Vicki. And though she and Vicki had had a couple lunches since, Benson had rarely pried into how their weekly sessions had been going.

"I didn't call you to discuss her progress; this isn't an episode of 'Mad Men' for goodness sake. Some of us still believe in doctor-patient privilege."

"Sorry, Doc, I just assumed that's why you were calling." Olivia apologized, not following the reference.

"It is. But no details, just generalizations. I want to let you know that when people have been victimized over extended periods of time—living in that constant fear of being violated again—they build layers of trauma. In a case like Vicki's, years between assaults, those layers are harder to peel back because they've been buried and hidden. We're actually seeing similar PTSD cases in returning soldiers who have served multiple tours in Iraq and Afghanistan. Each tour compounds the trauma they've already experienced." The good doctor sighed into the phone.

"That doesn't sound like the best prognosis." Olivia was trying to absorb the information and understand, but overall just summed up that it didn't sound good.

"Everyone's road to recovery is different, Olivia. You of all people know that. But until we know for sure, I feel it in Vicki's best interest for you to back away. " Helen made sure to tread lightly with the request.

"Back away from what?" Now Olivia was flabbergasted and not afraid to sound it.

"From seeing her so much. It seems like she's become quite reliant on you as of late and with the trauma being so raw, it's not a good idea to step out of your role as detective with her."

"Has she said something? Do I make her feel uncomfortable?" Olivia's biggest fears seemed to be made manifest.

"No. No. No. No. She hasn't said anything like _that_, it's just from listening to her and _knowing_ that in cases like these the person who removes a victim from trauma can be idolized by the person they save." The doctor paused. "To unhealthy levels."

Olivia didn't know whether to be relieved or concerned. That's why she tried to limit her exposure to shrinks. "Okay, well you know that my only concern is for Vicki's welfare, so what do I need to do?"

"Just let her have her own life. She has to re-build it from the bottom up. Don't ignore her, but don't encourage her either. And when she's ready, it'll be safe to let you in." That's the problem with psychiatrists. They don't even have to be in the same room with you to know what you're thinking. Olivia could even hear the smirk in Helen's voice as she spoke the last line.

At least Dr. Corrigan had left her with a little bit of hope.

* * *

In a situation like this, there was only one person Olivia could turn to—and it wasn't Stabler. Dr. George Huang looked a little out of place in the cop bar, especially with the half-glass of Chardonnay sitting in front of him. Olivia motioned for him to get off the stool and move to a quieter corner booth.

"I'm guessing this isn't merely a social call, Detective?" If Huang hadn't decided to be an FBI agent, he certainly had a budding career as a psychic to fall back on.

"No." This was going to be tougher than she initially anticipated."I'm sorta looking for a second opinion here, Doc."

"Well, I want to begin with my standard disclaimer that any medical advice I give is not actionable in court unless we go through the proper channels and you—as well as anyone else involved—are under no obligation to follow my recommendations." It amazed Olivia that Huang could keep a completely straight face uttering such nonsense.

"Okay." She dragged it out just to point out how awkward the agent was being. "Anyway, do you remember the Vicki Sayers rape case we worked a couple weeks back?"

"How could anyone forget? It's sickening how that sociopath was able to operate for so long and keep dodging justice because we can't test rape kits in a timely fashion." He saw Olivia open her mouth to start in and he held up his hand to stop her. "I don't include NYPD in that generalization, don't bite my head off." She closed her mouth. Momentarily.

"Well I, of course, recommended crisis counseling for her. Helen Corrigan, I know you're aware of her practice." Huang nodded from across the table, taking another sip of wine. "She called and said that it might be a good idea for me not to see Vicki so often outside of any clean-up necessary with the trial."

"How were you seeing her?" Dr. Huang narrowed his eyes and tried to keep the scandal judgment out of his voice.

"No, nothing like that." _Not that I haven't thought about it…_ "We've just met for a couple lunches, went to dinner and a movie after we arrested the bastard. Nothing serious."

"Oh, just your usual 'after-you-close-a-case' behavior with _every_ victim." Now he was just being mean and Benson didn't even qualify that statement with a response. He backed off a little. "Olivia, I just want to make sure this newfound relationship isn't some sort of project for you. You alone can't make her better."

"I realize that, George. I'm the one that recommended she go see Dr. Corrigan in the first place." Now Olivia wished she had ordered a drink when she walked in, already having waived off the server who had started towards them when they first sat down.

"I'm worried about you too, you know."

"Why do you need to be worried about me?"

"Well, this wasn't your standard SVU case." Huang backtracked, "not that any of them can be considered standard. But I know you took it a little more personal."

"Yeah, I don't know. I just felt this…connection with her. It's hard to explain, but it's not a project. I can tell you that much." She raised an eyebrow in askance and reached for George's wine glass. He nodded his assent. She took a sip knowing the alcohol would do nothing physically to calm her but needed something to do anyway.

"It's understandable. She's an attractive woman who needed your particular skills to escape continued abuse." Huang was nothing if not blunt. "It's only human to want to spend time with someone like that especially when you're Olivia Benson."

"Thanks, Doc. I think. But do you think Corrigan is on to something?"

"I think you've been in this business long enough to know when the time is right." Dr. Huang knew his friend wouldn't like what he said next. "My advice is you need to trust in your own judgment."

Olivia threw her hands up and mouthed "great" to no deity in particular then brought them to rest across her chest. She shook her head,"I can never win with you guys."

* * *

Olivia had initially hesitated accepting Vicki's invitation to meet her at the park during her lunch break, but as soon as the young woman mentioned buying her an ice cream she was in. That's how the world found the pair: sitting on a park bench side-by-side enjoying some creamy goodness.

"Louisiana? You're going to Louisiana?" This was definitely not the conversation Olivia had envisioned having.

"Dr. Corrigan thought it'd be a good idea. The builds are very structured and she says the most important thing to do to stave off PTSD is to establish a routine." Vicki tried to explain her course of action, but it was bringing up more emotions than she originally anticipated. It was hard to see what she assumed was hurt in the older woman's eyes.

"Isn't it still hurricane season?" Olivia's on-the-fly plan was to try and find any flaw in Vicki's decision. Even pathetic ones.

"They are over the worst." Vicki turned her head to meet her companion's gaze full on. "Olivia, it was either this or medical marijuana." Vicki expected at least a chuckle, she just got more of the detective's crestfallen expression.

"What about your job?"

"I've been pretty loyal to them for a long time. They had no problem giving me an extended leave of absence. And I've saved quite a bit over the years." She expected a compliment at her resourcefulness, but knew it wouldn't be forthcoming.

"But—"

"Olivia, _you_ know I need to do this." She wanted to stop Olivia's excuses no matter how good they made her feel. "And what I _need_ from you is to not make it so hard…okay?"

"Okay." Olivia was finally accepting Vicki's recovery plan and tried to suppress her selfishness. "Okay. It's just—I'm going to miss you." It was what she was honestly feeling.

"Hey, I'll miss you too." She patted Olivia's knee with her free hand. "Seriously, you're like my only friend." Vicki giggled. "I promise to write."

"What is this, the 19th century? Call, text, Skype?" Something about this girl made Olivia so much more playful. She liked it.

"Hey! I like to write. It's a lost art form." And she had tons of stationery that needed using.

"Just keep in touch, I want to know you're doing okay." Benson didn't sound _too_ motherly either.

"I will. And Dr. Corrigan has me set up with group therapy with a counselor she works with down there." Vicki turned back to her ice cream because she couldn't look at Olivia much longer without changing her mind. "I think this is going to be good, Olivia. I'll be helping people too."

"I know it will be good. Just stay safe, okay?"

"Geez, I'm not leaving this second. Let me finish my cone at least." The neglected ice cream was beginning to dribble down the side of the cone and onto Vicki's fingers. She quickly stopped the steady stream with a swipe of her tongue. Olivia tried not to stare.

"So do you need a ride to the airport?" Anything to distract her mind from the unseemly thoughts involving Vicki and ice cream.

"Now I just feel like you're trying to get rid of me," the younger woman joked, trying to suppress the blush she knew would come on from Olivia looking at her like that.

"I promise, nothing like that _at all_."

* * *

A/N3: Chapter 3 soon to follow. And by "soon" I mean in the next week. Ish.


	3. Promise Number Two

A/N: Yes, it's been FOREVER. But I kinda wanted to see how Olivia's personal life would play out towards the end of the year. Then I watched "Behave" again recently and got re-inspired. These two should be happy. Haha. Enjoy.

* * *

**Chapter 3**

October 23rd 2010

_Dear Olivia,_

_I just wanted to start by saying the team I'm working with think I'm nuts for sitting down and actually composing a bona fide hand-written letter. They keep coming up and offering their cell phones and laptops so I can call or email you. Then I tell them that I'm an old-fashioned kind of girl and show them that, yes, I do have an iPhone._

_I love writing letters, I always have. It's like a diary entry you can share. And the waiting,—in such stark contrast to the instant gratification of more modern modes of contact—is the best part. It just increases the anticipation until you know it's received and get a response. It's a physical memento that you can hold, store, and go back to again and again. And now I have someone to write to which is the best part of all._

_Louisiana's wonderful. Actually, the people are wonderful. The weather is my sworn enemy. I thought the humidity was the worst and now the cold is starting to creep in. Layering has become my best friend. Especially after hours and hours of painting dry wall, it will strip you down to your tank top. Painting is my favorite part (well, I don't think debris cleaning is anyone's favorite). At first I feared being alone with my thoughts for so long, but with Dr. Corrigan and group encouraging me to work through my stressors…it's practically therapeutic._

_It's weird though, I almost feel selfish dwelling on my own problems when people all around me are still living in the most desperate of situations. But their spirit! Rarely do I see anyone complaining about the temporary housing or how long it's taking to complete the work. They work side-by-side with us, gutting their homes and then restoring them to a semblance of what they once were. Even though everyone is feeling the downturn, especially since the oil spill, they still invite us to barbeques and boils. I must have gained at least ten pounds and I haven't even been here a month!_

_I'll probably call you next week to make sure you got this. In the meantime, promise me you'll eat and sleep at least once every couple of days. You big, brave NYPD detectives seem to forget to do that._

_Write back soon,_

_Vicki_

_P.S. Thinking of you._

__

_

* * *

_

November 22, 2010

Ever since Calvin moved in, Olivia had made a concerted effort to get home at a decent hour. She liked the routine they had settled into: dinner, homework, and even a bedtime story. That being said, Olivia found herself sitting on the couch with a glass of wine at a reasonable time to place a very important phone call. It was answered on the third ring.

Before Vicki even got out a greeting, Olivia jumped in. "Happy Birthday, birthday girl." It had sounded better in her head. She got laughter as the first response.

"Thanks." Vicki stepped outside her group housing apartment (and we use the term "apartment" loosely) to the porch area equipped with a few lawn chairs and a cooler miraculously stocked with beer. She took a seat in one of the chairs, letting out a satisfying creak.

"Did you like the care package I sent you?" Olivia smiled even though there was no one to see it.

"I haven't opened it yet. I thought you might call today…so I thought I'd wait." Vicki adjusted the cell phone until it rested between her shoulder and her ear, maneuvering the box she'd brought out with her so she could more easily view the contents.

"It's just some stuff I thought you might need. Nothing big…" It was a lot more awkward being on the phone with Vicki while she opened the gift than Olivia would have thought. She just really hoped the younger woman liked what she'd sent.

"Let's see," Vicki removed some of the packaging material from the box. She began to remove the item closest to her fingers. "Baby wipes! My new best friend!" She continued to rifle through the precious provisions, oohing and aahing over the Crystal Light, Twizzlers, and oh so necessary deodorant she uncovered. "Thank you, thank you, thank you…the newest issues of _Entertainment Weekly_," Vicki squealed and Olivia chuckled. Then Vicki uncovered a snapshot in a simple, wooden frame. "Awww, this must be Calvin. You're right; he's a very strapping boy." Vicki admired the photo of the young boy and Olivia. In the short time she knew the woman, she'd never seen her so happy.

"We took that at the Central Park Zoo. It was a fun day." Olivia remembered how fascinated Calvin had been with all the animals and how, for the first time, he had seemed comfortable in her presence.

"How's he doing?" Vicki stopped her perusal of her goodies and settled in to chat.

"He's doing a lot better since last time we talked. His grades are starting to come up and his teachers even say he's starting to socialize again. And he's really creative; I have a fridge covered in drawings to prove it." Olivia left out the part about his habit of signing his artwork "Calvin Benson" that'd recently developed.

"I'm glad. The last time you sounded on the verge of tearing all your hair out…or crying. Both equally scary." Olivia had explained the whole situation to Vicki when Calvin's mom had unexpectedly given custody to the detective about a month ago.

"I'd never thought I'd say this, but it's good to come home to someone." Vicki could hear the smile in Olivia's voice.

"I can tell you're the type of person that'd be really good at taking care of someone. You took care of me really well after everything." She paused before continuing, "Have you had any luck finding his father?" Vicki regretted asking as soon as the question came out of her mouth. She knew Olivia was becoming attached.

"You sound like Elliot." Olivia sighed, "No luck yet. I don't have that much to go on. I'll be lucky if I get a DNA match. And if I do, it's usually not for a good reason that it'd be in the system to begin with."

"It's not going to be easy either way. But if there is something Dr. Corrigan has taught me it's that you can't build a life on false hope. And I think that's true for Calvin as well as for you." Vicki didn't know everything about Olivia, but what she did know was that the detective sometimes cared too much for her own good. When it came to Olivia caring about her, Vicki was grateful. But when Olivia's concern had the ability to hurt the detective down the line, she wanted to advise caution.

"Yeah, I know." Olivia cleared her throat before trying to change the subject. "Hey, I think there's something you forgot in the box."

Vicki took some more of the packing paper out and all she saw was the bottom of the cardboard mailing box. Then her fingers brushed against a little token that had been pushed into the corner by all the other presents. She pulled the figurine out to examine it more closely. "It's a little blue bear! How cute."

"It's not just any little blue bear. It's a special birthday bear." Olivia regained her smile as she began to reminisce. "I think I got it when I was seven or eight, probably the year you were born. My birthday was the only day of the year when my mom would take me to McDonald's for a happy meal. I was always so excited to uncover the toy…it was one of the few times I'd get to see my mom smile."

"I can't accept this, you should keep it. It's a part of you." Vicki was touched that Olivia would share such an intimate story with her, even more so that she had offered to give her such a precious toy.

"Well, you can keep it while you're down there at least. He's lucky; he'll be good for you."

"Oh, he's lucky is he? I'll have to put him under my pillow then."

"You want him to suffocate?" Olivia asked flabbergasted before erupting into laughter.

"Oh my, I don't want him to suffocate." Vicki brought the plastic bear to her lips and placed an audible kiss on top of its tiny head. "I promise I'll keep him safe."

* * *

December 25, 2010

Detective Benson was on call for Christmas, but she wouldn't have it any other way. The rest of the squad deserved to have as much of an uninterrupted holiday as possible, given that they had family to spend it with. Olivia was once again alone since Vivian had made sure Calvin was taken away from her.

It was harder than she'd anticipated not having the young boy to take care of. Olivia didn't even bother decorating her apartment for the holidays, just didn't feel up to it. Elliot had invited her to Christmas dinner with the family, but Olivia preferred to play the Grinch alone and not in front of a crowd. So when her phone rang, she thought it was her partner trying once last time to convince her to come over. It wasn't Stabler.

"Hey you." Olivia tried to keep her tone happier than she felt.

"Merry Christmas, Olivia. So has it started snowing yet?" That is one thing Vicki was missing in Louisiana, a white Christmas.

"Actually, it's probably not going to snow. It's damn cold enough to, but no sign of precipitation."

"That's too bad. The first good snow storm is always so gorgeous over the City." It was a little rainy in Louisiana, just enough to force the building team to have to go out and throw tarps over the construction materials. Vicki had just gotten back and had about half an hour until holiday dinner with the crew.

"Until the next morning when it turns into dirty, dirty slush and Traffic is so overworked that you have detectives taking accident reports." It came out a little more bitter than Olivia liked.

"Yikes! Well, hopefully the snow waits until I get back and maybe I can change your mind about it." Vicki was taken aback by Olivia's weather bluntness.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to come out like that. It's just not the best Christmas I've ever had."

"Calvin." Vicki knew Olivia had been absolutely crushed when he was taken away almost three weeks ago.

"Yeah, pretty much. At least his grandparents let me send him a few presents so he doesn't feel completely abandoned by me." Olivia sank lower into the couch, putting her head in the hand not holding the phone.

"He's old enough to know it wasn't your choice to be separated from him. He knows you care." Vicki sighed. "It really is a horrible situation all the way around. I wish I was there to give you a hug."

"Yeah, me too." They both were silent for a moment, feeling the physical distance between them all the more. "By the way, when exactly are you coming back?"

"Two weeks! I'm excited because I'll be able to experience the City without the fear…thanks to you. Do you remember what the first promise you made to me was?"

"I made a lot of promises to you, maybe even some against better professional judgment." Olivia thought back to the chaos surrounding their meeting. Not ideal circumstances in the least.

"They got me through it, made me feel like we'd actually get him. I hope you don't regret them." The younger woman's voice shrank with self-consciousness.

"I don't, not at all. I think the first promise I made was to live with you for twenty years." It sounded rash now, but at the time it seemed necessary.

"Your first promise was to protect me. And when you said it, I believed it. I'll never be able to thank you for that." Vicki reveled in her nostalgia for a moment, now able to remember the events without opening up old wounds too deep. "But speaking of where to live, I actually sold my old apartment and got a condo on Sixth Avenue instead. I'm tired of the prison bars."

"From Hamilton Heights to Chelsea? That's a pretty big move distance-wise and price-wise." Olivia didn't hide her surprise.

"Close to Chelsea, it's the Flatiron District actually. A place called the Cammeyer? I've only seen pictures obviously," Vicki said excitedly.

"Whew, the Flatiron District. I don't even think they allow lowly Manhattan detectives near there."

"Oh please, Olivia. The same broker who helped me sell my mom's apartment got me a great deal. And it's not like I've been living large. I've saved a fortune plus the small inheritance from my parents…I finally get to have a place I can be proud of. And it's close to my favorite park," Vicki gushed.

"Gramercy Park? Don't tell me your place comes with a key." Olivia knew how exclusive keys to the park could be.

"Oh no, no, no, no. But my boss at the HMO is a member of the Players Club and offered to take me whenever I want. I think he'll just be happy to have me back because I'm his most efficient auditor," Vicki offered as explanation.

"I actually thought about swinging by yesterday because it's the only day the park is open to the public anymore. But I thought it'd be way too busy to be any sort of enjoyable."

"We'll go when I get back. I think I owe you an ice cream cone." Vicki could think of nothing better than spending time with Olivia in the lushness of the private park.

"I won't say no to an ice cream…but maybe closer to springtime." Olivia chuckled, remembering the last time they had spent quality time together was over a cone in a park. "So, are you going to need a ride from the airport?"

"I thought if I stayed on the phone long enough, I'd get you to offer." It was Vicki's turn to laugh then she added, "I'll email you my itinerary."

"It's a plan. I'll clear some personal time. Plus, I want to see this new, couldn't-afford-it-with-thirty-years-of-my-salary place."

"I have a feeling I'm never going to hear the end of it." Vicki turned serious for a second, "And there is something important I need to tell you."

"That doesn't sound good…" Olivia trailed off, eyebrows beginning to furrow.

"No, nothing bad. Just something I'd rather discuss in person. That is, _after_ you open the gift that Santa left for you here. I guess he got confused and took a wrong turn dropping it off in Louisiana instead of New York." Vicki let her tone turn flirtatious to put a halt to Olivia's worry.

"That Santa. I was wondering what happened because he left a package _for you_ at my place. He must be going senile…"Olivia gladly returned the flirtation earning a giggle from the other end of the phone.

"I don't want to go, but they are going to be dragging me off to dinner soon." Vicki lowered her voice to a more intimate tone, "Olivia, you should go over to Elliot's. I know it's a tough time, but you need to eat."

"How did you—?" Olivia was cut off before she could even finish her query.

"Just a little intuition. And I know how stubborn you can be. Usually it's adorable, but this time you need to give in and spend time with the people that love you."

"Okay, Dr. Sayers. I guess I have no choice. By the way, when is your next self-help book coming out?" Olivia asked sarcastically.

"You know what? I seem to be mistaken about this gift from Santa. Maybe it's not for you." Vicki could give as well as she got. And got a full-throated laugh from Olivia for that one.

"Just kidding. Just kidding! I'll head to Elliot's. They always have too much food anyway." Olivia knew Vicki was right, she should be around people instead of drowning in her sorrows.

"See, you'll be doing them a favor."

"Hey, Vicki? Thanks for calling…and Merry Christmas."

"Anytime. I'll see you soon. Say 'hi' to your partner for me." And with that, Vicki reluctantly ended the call.

_~TBC~_

* * *

A/N2: Beware! This story is very soon jumping the proverbial shark. The next chapter will began a departure from canon and all rational thought...but it is what it is. Hopefully the next update will be a lot sooner than the last...no promises. I have it mapped out in my head, now I just need to put it to paper.


	4. Promise Number Three

**A/N:** Yikes! I need to finish this story before the start of next season. Seriously? JLove possibly joining the cast? Best. News. Ever.

* * *

**Promise Number Three**

The drive to La Guardia was more familiar than Olivia Benson would like it to be. Not that she had to frequent the airport more than any other New Yorker, but because it was practically the same route she took when heading to Riker's.

This trip would be far more pleasant.

She'd borrowed a sedan from a friend so she could pick Vicki up from her flight arriving in from Louisiana. It had only been a few months, but it felt like an entire lifetime had transpired since she'd last seen the young woman. It'd been at least three ADAs ago, but that's not the reason it felt like so long.

It was because of Calvin Arliss. The time the young boy had spent in Olivia's life had been relatively short; it was the time from the moment they'd taken him away from her that seemed to drag on into eternity.

The good detective arrived early and managed to snag a primo spot in short-term parking so she had plenty of time to secure a security pass and begin her wait at the gate. TSA had been surprisingly accommodating in supplying Olivia with access. She'd take it as a good sign since TSA was so rarely painted in any sort of good light…

A quick check of the display screens indicated that Vicki's flight was right on-time and Benson had a little more than ten minutes before she'd be face-to-face with the younger woman once more. Olivia smiled wryly as she confronted the excitement and apprehension growing in her gut. When Vicki first informed Olivia that she was going to do relief work in the Gulf coast, the older woman had been sad that the flourishing friendship would be coming to an end.

But it hadn't ended; the friendship had managed to become stronger as their distance increased. Olivia had cherished their frequent phone calls, emails, and very old-fashioned handwritten letters exchanged while Vicki was down south. The detective had relied on the younger woman's sound advice in troubled times as well as the easy way Vicki could make her laugh.

Olivia hadn't been this fond of a woman since Alex. Though a relationship with Alex had presented its own set of complications, even contemplating more than a friendship with Vicki Sayers made her previous liaisons seem like a walk in the park. But the important conclusion Olivia had reached was that she at least wanted to try.

The detective stood as the plane she'd been waiting on began to de-board. She crossed her arms across her chest, taking comfort in her tailored leather jacket and the way it built her confidence. Olivia began building her resolve. Today would be the day. Today would be the day she would tell Vicki that she wanted to be more than friends.

It was easy to pick Vicki out from the crowd because her smile was unforgettable and irresistible. And the younger woman was smiling right now. Olivia broke out in a smile of her own as she waved at the other woman after catching her eye. The detective tried to look above the bustling crowd to see what was causing such mirth on Vicki's face.

Soon the younger woman was before Olivia, slightly tanner and with shorter hair. And there was one more significant difference. Vicki was holding a dark-skinned baby, no more than sixteen months old, against her body as she made to greet Olivia.

"This is Gideon." Vicki shifted the small child higher onto her hip. "I kinda adopted him."

* * *

The next few minutes were a haze for Olivia Benson. She knew her mouth was slightly open and the question "how?" had come out, but now all she was aware of was Vicki nervously talking and shifting her eyes back and forth, never quite meeting the detective's gaze. They were still in the middle of the arrival gates and people were rushing about to their intended destinations, not even giving a second glance to what was transpiring between the two women.

Phrases like "declared in his best interest," "like a kinship adoption," and "express home study by Dr. Corrigan" went in one of Olivia's ears and right out the other. The detective looked down at the child who was busy sucking on his fingers and thought better of it. The kid was adorable and, if she looked too long, Olivia feared she wouldn't be able to look away.

Instead Benson held up a hand to stop Vicki's rapid explanations and said, "Let's just head to baggage claim."

* * *

They'd had a pretty uneventful time getting Vicki's checked baggage. Awkwardly silent, but uneventful nonetheless. It was more of the same as the group made their way to the car. Olivia loaded the two big pieces of luggage into the trunk and then helped Vicki strap in the car carrier into the backseat. She caught a glimpse of an expression on Vicki's face that could only be described as bordering on frightened. After Olivia made sure Gideon was secured safely, she turned to the younger woman and loosely grabbed one of her wrists in reassurance.

"Vicki, I just need a minute to process this. I'm not mad or anything." Olivia sighed. "It's just a bit of a shock. When you said you had something to tell me, I thought it was that you were joining a gym or something. Not adopting a baby." The detective's attempt to inject some humor into the situation fell rather flat.

"Okay," was Vicki's only response before she got into the front seat and buckled up. Not an "I understand" or "I know it's surprising," just "okay." Olivia exhaled deeply before she walked around to get into the driver's seat.

The entire ride through Queens was made in relative quiet. Except for a few squeaks and coos coming from Gideon's car seat, nothing above the constant drone of traffic could be heard.

As they reached Manhattan, Olivia thought it was time to open up discussion.

"Who's going to take care of him during the day?" Olivia's attempt to start the conversation came out more confrontational than she had wanted.

"I work from home, remember?" Vicki crossed her arms along her chest, preparing for battle. The young woman knew how headstrong Olivia could be. It was one of the qualities of her personality that first attracted her.

"What about going back to school? I thought you were thinking of going back to school?" Olivia didn't like the desperate tone that began to color her voice. Olivia knew the commitment had been made and these questions would be fruitless.

"Olivia. Look at him. He's gorgeous. He's amazing. I'm in love with this beautiful baby boy." Vicki got a faraway look for a second before remembering, "Wait. Don't look at him, you're driving."

"It just seems like a big decision to have made in such a short time. And your recovery process is still—" Olivia kept alternating between tightly grasping the steering wheel and flexing her fingers against it. It was a nervous habit.

"Olivia! Stop before you say something that will make me regret you picking me up." Vicki took a deep, long breath and let it out slowly to calm her nerves. "Don't you think I always wanted a family of my own? When I was in California and engaged, I didn't fantasize about my wedding. I fantasized about the kids we were going to have. About waking up on the weekend and making them pancakes or helping them with their homework on school nights. And my rapist took that all away from me…until now."

Olivia sighed deeply before muttering a brief apology. She finally realized that it was a little hypocritical for her to be criticizing Vicki's decision to adopt when she would have done the same thing with Calvin in a heartbeat. And who was she to say if Vicki was emotionally ready to handle a child? The younger woman was making nothing but valid points and Olivia was beginning to feel like an idiot.

"I understand that desire for a family. Maybe I'm just jealous." Olivia shrugged her shoulders as she made the slow turn onto Avenue of the Americas and joined the rest of the traffic.

"You don't need to be jealous. I want you to be a part of Gideon's life." Vicki said it with surprising surety. "A part of our lives. You saved me, Olivia. I'll never forget that."

The older woman couldn't help the smile that overtook her face as she pulled into the loading zone in front of Vicki's new place.

* * *

The Cammeyer was one of those places where, upon entering, you stand up straighter and brush down any wrinkles that have formed on your clothes. The doorman was more than courteous in allowing Olivia to stay parked in the loading zone while Vicki signed the last of the paperwork to make the apartment officially hers. And the management staff was very accommodating in seeing them up to the sixth floor to introduce the newest tenant to her space.

The two-bedroom condo had already been furnished to Vicki's specifications and her personal effects moved to their proper places. All the baby stuff was new and Olivia figured this realtor of Vicki's must be a close friend of the family to go to such lengths in making the place feel comfortable and functional the first day in.

After making sure Gideon was secure in the living room playpen, Vicki offered to make Olivia tea. Feigning not wanting to have the car towed, Olivia made towards the door for a quick exit. Before she could escape, Vicki hugged her and whispered a thank you.

"Promise me you'll at least think about it," Vicki pleaded with such emotion. Olivia knew exactly what she meant but didn't trust her voice and instead nodded her assent before walking out the door.

* * *

**A/N:** Two more chapters and this story will be done. Promise. *wink* Also, the baby will be much cuter next chapter...


End file.
